"How can I play baseball if I'm stupid? If I was stupid I wouldn't have pitched in the World Series. I'd be playing ball in Mexico or Yugoslavia or on Pluto."

"I always have trouble seeing the ball in the daytime here (Wrigley Field)."

"I throw the ball ninety-two miles an hour, but they hit it back just as hard."

"It wasn't my arm (that was injured). It was my forearm."

"I win or I die."

"My favorite word in English is 'youneverknow.'"

"That's why I don't talk. Because I talk to much."

"There are three-hundred thousand sportswriters and they're all against me. Every one of them."

"There is one word in America that says it all, and that one word is, 'You never know.'"

"You can't worry if it's cold; you can't worry if it's hot; you only worry if you get sick. Because then if you don't get well, you die."

"You-never-know."

"Both teams got nothing, but our nothing (Joaquin Andujar) was louder than theirs (Mike Heath)." - Sandy Alderson

"In recent years the Dominican Republic has become a producer of shortstops-and eccentric righthanded pitchers. Hurler Joaquin Andujar billed himself as 'one tough Dominican.' As a St. Louis Cardinal, he won 20 games in back-to-back seasons following some lean years. After one win to end a drought, Andujar declared, 'God is back in the National League. In fact, he's staying at my house. I'm having a barbecue for him.' Andujar also fancied himself a dangerous hitter, despite his lifetime .127 batting average. He switch-hit, but sometimes he hit right against righthanded pitchers and left against lefties. Teammates speculated that Andujar grabbed a batting helmet and decided which way to hit depending upon what side the ear flap was on. Asked how he'd pitch to himself following one of his rare offensive outbursts, Andujar answered, 'Fastball right down the middle. What do you think, I'd try to get myself out?'" - Eliot Cohen

"It was no problem (getting along with Joaquin Andujar). I didn't talk to him on days he was mad, and he was mad all year long." - Whitey Herzog